We had agreements we thought we could keep
To only cross over- the trust that I ripped.
Her heart so innocent, so pure, and full of wonder-
Is the heart slipped from my hands, crashing down under.
A million glass pieces, shards that turned black;
Blood from my hands slipping through every crack.
Where light once was came darkness from within
Seeping into her veins and through her bloodstream.
Weakening of the flesh, weakening of the soul
Lost will, lost hope, crushed dreams; an empty dark hole.
Forced on the ground- helpless and confused,
It’s been nine months now, but bruise came after bruise.
A pain in your chest, a punch in your gut,
Constricting of the lungs, deep breathes- no air.
A noise in your head, poison starts to spread
Tears well up in your eyes; they start to flow.
A memory- a gift; this memory- a curse
To remember is a nightmare during the day.
Never ending nightmare, still gruesome until now
You wonder when it’ll end, you wonder how.
They say that an individual’s friends reflect parts of himself.
They say how he talks about others is how he’ll talk about you.
They say jokes are half meant- especially the bad ones.
Passed on throughout time, these words must hold some truth.
What makes a man, a man? All she sees are teenage boys.
They say boys mature slower- this may be true as well;
Yet this is never a valid justification
Such as the statement “Boys will be boys.”
How can she be blamed when she starts to doubt-
When tears fall from her eyes at least once a week.
Perhaps she has learned her lesson to never trust others-
To love herself first and not give away her everything.
She has thousands and millions of reasons to leave;
Yet that sole reason to stay, she chose to hope and believe.
So small and fragile- one wrong move can shatter her world.
Princess of china, tired and lost in her second thoughts.
Perhaps I expect too much
Or think way more than I should
That I become afraid of things
And finish with nothing done.
We know not all rules are right
Though sometimes we have to abide
In order to spare ourselves
Of consequences we don’t deserve.
Gray areas are everywhere
And certainty has become rare;
In a society so wretched,
Humanity is far fetched.
Perhaps you’ve done plenteous
That lead my mind to wander far-
To fantasize one happy ending
And thousands of dreadful ones.
I tried to go with the river like everybody else,
But I end up having trouble catching my breath.
I built a canoe to help me row through,
But the current was so strong, it broke in two.
I fell into the water, unto you I cling;
For there’s one thing I can’t do- I can’t swim.
I am terrified; I long to return to land,
But you’re a swimmer, a diver, a merman.
The beauties and dangers of the water I saw.
You promised you won’t let the water hurt me;
But one day curiosity got the best of us,
And we went to the deepest parts of the sea.
O the horrors of such forbidden route-
Still haunts me every single night.
Though you promised no one would ever know,
Such memories don’t just disappear from sight.
My mind went crazy ever since that day,
The voices in my head- they decided to stay.
No matter how hard I tried to remove the stench,
At the end of the day- still the deep sea scent.
We say we won’t return, but we always go back.
King of Atlantis sent his soldiers to attack.
On the wanted list- your face and mine;
Is there still room for reform? Do we still have time?
I fell in love with a merman, what can I do?
He fell in love with a human; the world’s so cruel.
As much as I want to bide, I need to return,
The land’s where I belong; I need to grow and learn.
As you swim, I’ll walk by the riverbank.
Maybe one day I’ll become a mermaid-
Or you become a man; if not,
At least we had what we had.
I can’t believe I ever thought about leaving,
I can’t believe I ever doubted your love for me.
I cried the day I realized I loved you,
As I foresaw the wounding roads that lie ahead.
The days came so fast and left too quickly;
I wasn’t ready for this moment to arrive.
A forbidden love- we’re running like criminals;
A new chapter we must conquer in our lives.
Ten years is a long journey without you by my side,
For time spent with you is never enough.
I can’t promise you anything, though I will try.
I can’t imagine living my life with another guy.
I want to wait, but the future is unclear.
I’m afraid, I’m confused, I can’t think it through.
You want to wait even without my guarantee,
A love like yours- so rare, I might never find again.
I’m torn in two by the people who love me;
May God be the referee of this match.
I pray for a sign, I pray for His mercy;
I come to repentance, I ask if you are to be mine.
When dark clouds form and thunders roar,
He is the sanity of my head.
Pillow of my bed, witty to the core,
He is the salt to my bread.
Never hesitating to give me more,
Though he doesn’t know what lies ahead.